The Charisma Myth: How to Engage, Influence and Motivate People

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Showing vulnerability and humility make you more relatable and helps to avoid the feeling of alienation, which is a real risk when your charisma gives you a touch of the superhuman. But if you want charisma, make sure your strategy includes the services of a good public-relations firm, a savvy advance team, or — best of all — a journalist who will describe you as already possessing “charisma. Being interested in other people and being sympathetic to their concerns and problems are already among my natural tendencies, and the book taught me that I can actually improve my social skills by just focusing on and tapping into those two tendencies. Another way to destigmatize discomfort is to remind yourself that you’re not alone in this experience.

Not every life hack can be summed up in a blog post, so we’ve decided to review some of our favorite life-changing books for deeper dives into life’s most important topics. Cabane regularly coaches and speaks to leadership at Fortune 500 companies, has been a columnist for Forbes and The Huffington Post, and also taught a course at Berkeley’s Business School so popular that university staff had to be on guard to keep unregistered students from attending. There are a lot of stories and impressive anecdotes, but the step-by-steps and how-to's are few and far between. Think of all the previous times when you felt just like this—that you wouldn’t make it through—and yet clearly you did.The analogies, examples, strategies, and tools are helpful for anyone who wants to become more charismatic. But this book feels different, because rather than giving me some new technique that I might use for a while and then forget about once it was no longer exciting, it made me realize that I was already doing some of the things that it said that I should be doing, just without realizing it.

Aristotle claimed – and many modern politicians are fully aware of it – that what you say is much less important than who you are. So, all in all, well worth a read if you're interested in the topic and you will probably come away having learned something useful. The Charisma Myth describes the various types of charisma: focus, visionary, kindness, and authority, giving overviews and examples of notable leaders who excelled at each (some multiple at different times). See your thoughts as graffiti on a wall or as little electrical impulses flickering around your brain. Jump up and down, smile the biggest smile you can, wave your arms in the air, and while doing all this, try to feel depressed.Still in the early part of the book, she says "The equation that produces charisma is actually fairly simple. Everyone is unique and you can find your own charisma style that suits your personality, goals and the situation you’re in.