The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read (and Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did): THE #1 SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER

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Sometimes , I get carried away under stress and stop observing my surroundings which results in a sequence of thoughts that conquer my mind and are unrelated to my feeling of that particular situation. This is not a good approach, instead I should stay focused. Well, this book suggest an exercise to stay focus, in general. She calls it, the Grounding Exercise:

Aku pribadi belajar banyak sekali dari buku ini. Alasannya sederhana. I want to treat my partner (& people around me) better. Apa yg ditulis oleh Perry dengan "children", aku ubah menjadi "partner." Membayangkan bagaimana menjadi individu yang merupakan "emotional container", suportif, & menerapkan "rupture & repair." Menjadi manusia yg hangat & tidak menyakiti orang lain. Memutus rantai kekerasan (verbal dan/atau fisik). Styling by Jo Jones; hair and makeup by Juliana Sergot using skincare by Dermalogica & Bumble & Bumble; fashion assistant Sam Deaman; photographer’s assistant Gabor Herczegfalvi The following chapters went downhill. Perry starts with pregnancy and goes through from babyhood to adulthood with her parenting advice. Much of this has already been published by other authors and there isn't much new advice here. As I have already read other books and articles about parenting (covering topics like being responsive to your baby, validating your child's feelings, etc) I felt like I had read it all before. Perry's writing style is weak and uncaptivating compared to other parenting books.With a healthy dose of sanity, Philippa Perry's compassionate advice could help you become a happier, wiser person. At university I studied chemistry, but never loved it. Then,
in my fourth year, I gave the editor of the student newspaper some quotes for the feminism society while I was drunk and
he thought I was funny, so he offered me a column. That’s when I found a hobby that I loved enough to make my job. I enjoyed reading this book and I think you will too. This book is of the length of a novella and you will comfortably finish it in one sitting or two. I could be wrong: maybe it has affected me, maybe I wouldn’t have such great fashion sense if he was normcore, but I’ll never know. The only marked difference growing up was that my house had a better collection of face glitter than most. It is one of the cliches of parenthood that the behaviour which comes most easily (a reproving tone of voice, say, or an attitude to your child’s tears) reflects what your parents did with you. It takes a while to realise that what feels like instinct is often an inheritance, that just because something comes “naturally” it is not necessarily constructive. It may get in the way, first, of the relationship between parent and child, and then, because this relationship provides the foundation for all future relationships, of how the child will get on in the world.

Perry shrugs – this is all work that she has undertaken herself. She has been facing up to the way she was parented since the age of 12. Her family was “good, kind, middle-class”, but raised children the way you’d “train a dog, with punishment rather than encouragement”. Ultimately, this damaged the young, sensitive Perry, and led her into therapy, and eventually a career in mental health. 'My parents didn’t comfort children because they thought children would just want to be upset more' In this warm, practical and witty book, No.1 Sunday Times bestselling psychotherapist Philippa Perry shows you how to approach life's big problems. Sanity falls into two groups: one of people who have strayed into chaos and whose lives lurch from crisis to crisis, and ones who are in a rut and operate from a limited set of outdated rigid responses. Some of us manage to belong to both groups at once. This book is about how to stay on the path between those two extremes, how to remain stable and yet flexible, coherent and yet able to embrace complexity. This probably means paying as much attention to scheduling fun as we do to scheduling our work. As the great violinist and conductor Yehudi Menuhin said: “Anything that one wants to do really, and one loves doing, one must do every day. It should be as easy to the artist and as natural as flying is to a bird. And you can’t imagine a bird saying, ‘Well, I’m tired today, I’m not going to fly.’”

Retailers:

Philippa Perry adalah seorang psikoterapis. Dengan jam terbang yang tinggi dan variasi kasus yang ia tangani, maka sudah tidak perlu dipertanyakan lagi bagaimana kualitas tulisannya. Awalnya, aku punya ekspektasi bahwa buku ini akan sama seperti buku kesehatan mental yang pernah aku baca. Seperti misalnya Lost Connection oleh Johann Hari, Filosofi Teras oleh Henry Manampiring, atau The Things You Can Only See When You Slow Down oleh Haenim Sunim. Yang intinya adalah soal menyadari ada hal-hal yang bisa kita kendalikan dan ada yang tidak. Jelas sekali yang dititikberatkan oleh Perry sepanjang buku ini adalah tentang bagaimana kita merawat hubungan dengan diri kita sendiri. Tips dan latihan yang diberikan juga mengenai memfokuskan pikiran tentang kita. Membatasi konsumsi berita dan mendorong diri untuk mencoba hal baru adalah salah dua dari saran yang diberikan Perry agar manusia bisa berfungsi maksimal meskipun keadaan sedang tidak baik-baik saja. If we practice more optimism, disasters will still happen - but predicting disasters does not make them more tolerable or ward them off. In The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read (and Your Children Will Be Glad that You Did), renowned psychotherapist Philippa Perry shows how strong and loving bonds are made with your children and how such attachments give a better chance of good mental health, in childhood and beyond.