The PDA Paradox: The Highs and Lows of My Life on a Little-Known Part of the Autism Spectrum

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This in no way shape or form tells us what PDA is and it attempts it, all it succeed in doing it making us feel repulsed by an overly pampered middle class boy who seemed to have too many tantrums and blessed with parents with money who could accommodate his bad temper. He might be neurodivergent however totally failed in making the reader understand the pathology or make us feel compassion and understanding for the condition. My passion has always been working with autistic children and teenagers - I believe that they have so much to offer, and yet the education system often fails them because staff do not have the right skills and experience." The more demands are perceived or placed on you, the more you will be pushed towards meltdown – and no one wants that. Pushing yourself to meet demands in high stress times can cause burnout, and then you’ll get nothing done. Sometimes ODD is given as a diagnosis when the underlying autism hasn't been identified. Strategies suggested for ODD, AD and CD (such as stricter boundaries and consequences) can actually increase anxiety levels and have not been found to be effective in the long term (or even short and middle term!).For more reading on all these conditions, please visit my blog post ' The difference between PDA and ODD ' . Also, good article. I find writing lists extremely helpful – and keeping a small notebook on me. And refuse to buy outside of it or deviate from my plan otherwise the impulse control can be so problematic (I can just leave it for next time if not pre-decided – it eliminates stress of decision making on the spot in public) . What seems like a good idea when even mildly sensory overwhelmed is often not.

Bless your heart for writing on this, it made me laugh. And if all fails — may I make a suggestion, it could be your 16th point. I wont be PDA about how right I* am on this point…but 16 should be “If all fails, start laughing uncontrollably and with a robust for the joy of it.” Go to school. Get a job. Get married. Buy a house. Have children. Have the same cookie-cutter life as all the Smiths and the Joneses. I tried, HARD, to fit into these moulds but always ended up sabotaging them or only being able to do them for a short time before the need to do something else took over. Harry, if you read this review, please know how much I truly appreciate your candid words and for not “binning” this book! Sorry for the very long post, but every post I read is giving me hope after a very difficult and traumatising three years. And it calms my fears about my son just having violent tendencies. As well as confirms my feeling that he isn't a “naughty child” but rather he struggles. I don’t know about you, but I have very poor impulse control which has led to me painfully regretting some of my impulsive decisions. If you have someone you trust who is sensible and has your best interests at heart, just run your more extreme impulses by them before jumping in head first.

15 Life Hacks for PDA

I also realized that I haven’t been watching your videos enough lately since I was completely surprised; I had no idea that you had been working on this great book….. Been on an extended rabbit trail for a while now, so yeah, lol….. I listened so intently that I listened to the whole audiobook in two sessions; only stopping the first day (yesterday) when I could no longer ignore my earth suit’s nagging incessancy for basic needs. The sense of belonging is one that every human in this scary world yearns for so find those that you belong with. They’re out there, I guarantee it.

This is exactly how we have to do things too. Sadly people who don't live with it all the time tend to not see the reactions so well unless it's explained to them x Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) is a condition that is characterized by a avoidance of everyday demands and activities. Having PDA doesn’t mean that you avoid every single demand/potential demand that you come across. It’s fluid. When you are less anxious and are in control, the need to resist the demand – to gain control – is far less than the times when you feel out of your comfort zone and your need for control is sky high. With this comes a much better chance to be able to do the things you want to do. If they like being in the garden; cordon off a section of the garden that they can do what they like with (as long as it’s not very dangerous to themselves or others). DO NOT interfere with their section unless they have specifically asked you for help. Let them be in charge of what film is watched on movie night or what takeaway you are going to have for dinner. Having a card shown to me is often like splashing water on my face. It alerts me to look at what I’m doing and assess it with clarity rather than slapdash over excitement.

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Having a range of things that you can be in control of will help to keep your anxiety down, and you can go to these things and tinker when you feel a little anxious. Just stopping everything and going with the flow of what your brain decides it wants to do can be powerful to reduce anxiety. It puts you right in the driving seat, which gives us PDAers all that lovely control that we thrive on. Autism is a spectrum condition and affects people in different ways. Like all people, autistic people have their own strengths and weaknesses. Social interaction and communication can be difficult for some autistic people but others may enjoy it. Intense interests and repetitive behaviour are often seen along with differing sensory experiences'.