Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office: Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers (Nice Girls Book)

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The fundamental message of moving beyond what young women are taught about being 'a nice girl' is great. There are sprouts of really strong material around improving communication learned in childhood, definitely. But the structure of the book (a giant listicle) doesn't go in depth about any one, and there are better resources for this.

Did you know that, even after years of progress in women’s rights, women all over the world still earn consistently less than men? Women are also less likely to hold highly influential positions. For example, they make up a mere 3.8 percent of CEOs of Fortune 500 companies. I am not quite sure where this involuntary reflex came from, but once I started to pay attention to the number of times I apologized unnecessarily it really started to bug me, and so now I make a conscious effort not to. Whether it is used as a conflict-reducing technique or as a way to avoid being perceived as if we are taking power or advantage from others, apologizing when it’s not due, makes us look like we are at fault, when actually, we are not. DON'T BE AFRAID TO SPEAK UP. Probably my #1 problem, both professionally and academically. If I don't 100% have to talk, I won't. Too many occassions of being told how dumb my opinion/thought/comment/question was has made me incredibly wary of ever opening my mouth, even if I know that I'm right. I know that I need to speak up more, and a good way of doing this is to practice speaking up in meetings (or class) at least once per session. It gets easier each time. And this is totally true. What happens is, that if you continue to go past the baseline, you won’t always be recognized, but you’ll usually be given more work to do because you’ve shown you can and will do it. You will set expectations that will be difficult to break free from later on.I say ‘the right words’ because Lois P. Frankel left me with very mixed feelings. I loved it and hated it. You can still be who you are and operate according to your values, while asking for what’s rightfully yours, setting better boundaries, speaking up, and learning to act like you deserve your success. Because you do.

Some women ask for permission more out of habit than actually having to ask for the green light for something. By asking for permission before acting, we are less likely to be accused of making a mistake, but we are also less likely to be perceived as confident risk-takers. Failing to proactively negotiate at work costs nice girls not only money, but affects career opportunities and job success as well”, says Frohlinger, author, keynote speaker, and Managing Director for Negotiating Women Inc. “ Women have to raise their hands to let people know they are interested when a big job becomes available. They have to request the resources required to get the job done. They have to reach an agreement on project parameters and deadlines. And yes, they certainly have to advocate when it comes to compensation”. CAROL FrohlingerIt will create an imbalance in your workload and lead to taking more responsibility than you should. Remember that people are not hired and promoted just because they work hard. It’s a great plus, sure, it says you’re engaged and committed to your work and the company, but there are other things like people knowing your character and feeling confident about your ability to deliver results and get the job done (which isn’t always necessarily equal to doing the job yourself). In this sense, learning how to properly delegate and having clearly defined responsibilities for each team member can help you avoid the tendency of doing other people’s work. I have been recommending this book to any woman who I feel has what it takes or has an interest in excelling in the business world. I can't say enough good things about it. Things I hated: Frankel's vitriolic dislike of tattoos plus her other bizarre / conservative grooming tips. Her insistence that being a whistle blower or holding management to its policies (or legal obligations) won't get you anywhere. The author said avoiding office politics was a mistake. For years, I have been trying to avoid the politics because I thought I was above it, and I thought it was the "right" thing to do. My mistake. Around a year ago I was wandering around Amsterdam’s American Book Centre, and “ Nice Girls Don’t Get The Corner Office” by Lois P. Frankel caught my eye. As someone who’s into personal growth, the book resonated with my interest in career development, and its provocative title did the rest.