If you and your partner both enjoy watching porn solo, then there’s a good chance you’ll enjoy it together too. The only safe and consensual way to try paraphilia is to (consensually!) add it to your dirty talk. But, maybe wait until you know someone and their preferences before whispering, "I want to cook and eat you alive, honey." 21. Quirofilia

Suspending judgment can be hard. I have found that if I bring the full intensity of my feminist self to my fantasy life, that things record-scratch pretty fast. My inner sex goddess is very femme, likes to be spanked sometimes, and talks dirty about what she wants. She can be really loud, likes to kiss girls, and longs to know what it would feel like to be between two men (cops and helicopter pilots can come to the front of the line). And that’s the tame stuff. I had to give myself permission to be turned on by the things I am turned on by, and approach it with curiosity—even things that feel uncomfortable at first. Otherwise I won’t give myself fantasy options to play with, and may cheat us out of some awesome hot times that could be edgy, affirming, loving, and completely consensual all at the same time. Play with Options While thinking about a taboo sexual act or situation can be intensely erotic, "we may not actually want to do them," says Cyndi Darnell, a clinical sexologist based in New York City. "Instead, these fantasies can offer a portal into aspects of our non-sexual emotions that we're trying to reconcile in our day-to-day lives." out what your sexual fantasies might mean? These are a few of the most common ones.Erotic humiliation lets you reclaim embarrassment by getting off on it. "Humiliation play is a consensual power exchange that is a very typical fetish. It can help people heal parts of the self that may have been bullied as a child. There's a sense of mastery over something that may have previously been non-consensual," says Renye. 14. Spectrophilia Sensation play can be a part of BDSM, but it doesn’t have to be all pain if that’s not what you’re into. In my humble and horny opinion, audio porn is a deeply underrated way of consuming your smut. Don’t get me wrong, I’m also a fan of watching porn, but there’s something uniquely satisfying about listening and tapping into your own imagination with the help of anything from narrated erotica to standalone sounds of pleasure.

If you've ever had sex as a guest in someone's house, you know that the thrill of getting caught can make your romp seem even hotter. And 57 percent of women fantasize about taking things even further by having sex in a public place, according to the research published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. "There's a sense of liberation and empowerment in fantasizing about having an audience and the idea that you sexually excite others with your performance and arousal," says Bromley. Why not start off your next sexual encouner with a massage, rubbing the oil, well, wherever you want. Sex in a car

2. Quinn

Some people get off on the idea or sight of their significant other getting it on with someone else. For example, it’s perfectly normal to be turned on by a steamy same-sex scene even if you don’t identify as gay, or by any fantasy you can think of. That certainly solves the mystery of why some of the most popular erotica plots don’t end up being expressed in real life — they’re simply hot to read about and think about, nothing more.