The Mood Hoover

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If their mindset is particularly negative, then trying to redirect the conversation onto more positive or hopeful topics can be a smart move. Avoid them. While we believe that no problem is insurmountable, we also understand that it is impossible for every member of your organisation to get on and sometimes compromises must be made.

Encouraging self reflection and honesty may help them understand how they are perceived to others and they may make positive changes on their own. I’m not talking about the colleague who lets off steam about something or the teacher who often gets involved in heated discussions regarding school policy. I’m not talking about the staff member having a moan about a parent or difficult child. This is all healthy – after all, it’s good to talk and share our problems. In many cases, talking about your problems can help to iron them out or can make you feel better about a particular situation. Instead, I’m talking about the person who constantly and relentlessly moans about everything and anything, all of the time. It’s natural to try and ignore someones bad behaviour, hoping they are just having a bad day. It can be very difficult to approach someone and comment on how they make you feel, especially if they are a friend of family member. If you choose to ignore it, you need to perfect the ability to switch them off when they start to drain you. It’s the only way to not let them get to you. ChallengeAs a representative of a research and development company, I have never looked at a failed trial as a negative because you are never going to get it right the first time. Rather I view it as a positive and a step closer to finding the solution. In the quantum realm of emotions, empathy reigns supreme. When a team member becomes a mood hover, channel your inner quantum physicist and practise empathy. It's the ability to understand and share someone else's emotional experience, even if you can't explain why they suddenly turned into a grumpy goat. Remember, empathy has the power to heal emotional ruptures and restore cosmic harmony.

A difficult employee – we all have experience of them…. at best draining, but left unchallenged, they can be downright toxic. At this point it’s worth telling your mood hoover what great behaviour looks like and give examples of being interactive and proactive. ‘As well as airing their problems, encourage them to come up with solutions,’ says Helen. ‘That makes their job more interesting, too.’ Keep the dialogue going Have you had any conversations about how you're feeling? Not rows but sitting him down & laying it out clearly as you have above? We have a video series that is dedicated to team building ideas and another dedicated to team morale which can help you to support any mood hoover you come across!

Be polite, professional and supportive, but do what you need to do to protect your own mental health at the moment – it’s taken a bit of a battering recently. If that means keeping your distance from the mood hoover for a while, then do so. What do you think would change in 2 years? He is who he is. Presumably you've talked to him about it and he doesn't want to change. And it's about much more than being a mood hoover. He treats you with contempt and disrespect. That runs much deeper. We’ve had to adapt to an unprecedented amount of change. The last-minute announcements of government decisions and changes in policy have only added to the stress for leaders and those working in education. There’s certainly been a lot to moan about. pedestrian rage - likewise if we go for a walk in the park he will find fault in the way someone’s walking (too slow, pushing past etc). He huffs and storms past people, even gets annoyed at old people ffs. Flexibility, inspiration, and creativity - that’s what employers want - as Marc puts it himself - even if you didn't need emotional intelligence to get into your ideal school - you will need it to get out!!

I’ve seen teachers in tears because a colleague refuses to try out something or simply dismisses their ideas in planning meetings. One of the overriding characteristics of a mood hoover is that they are emotionally draining and exhausting to be around, and to interact with. They may also show some or all of the following: It’s important to keep talking after that initial conversation to keep the negativity at bay. ‘You want them to have enough trust so they feel able to be honest with you,’ says Helen. ‘They might be going through hard times at home and need space. But you only know those things if you have a good relationship with them.’ When it becomes a disciplinary issue Alternatively, they simply play the game and do their own thing anyway. I’ve often planned for my team, only to find the mood hoover did it all completely differently, if at all.

Option 1: Ignore it

If this isn’t enough then you can lend a sympathetic ear for a short time. They may just need to know that their concerns have been heard and not dismissed outright. With that said it’s important to promote and protect your own positive mindset too. If they are affecting your productivity try to limit your time with them. If this isn’t enough then calmly and politely insist that while you can discuss some things with them your workload is just as significant as theirs and they need to respect professional boundaries.