This Book May Save Your Life

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Eger explains that the worst prison she experienced is not the prison that Nazis put her in but the one she created for herself, the prison within her own mind. She describes the twelve most pervasive imprisoning beliefs she has known—including fear, grief, anger, secrets, stress, guilt, shame, and avoidance—and the tools she has discovered to deal with these universal challenges. Accompanied by stories from Eger’s own life and the lives of her patients each chapter includes thought-provoking questions and takeaways, such as: Honey, may you also choose to give up the prison and do the work to be free. To find in your suffering your own life lessons. To choose which legacy the world inherits. To hand down the pain—or to pass on the gift.” Un libro que no sólo tenéis que leer sino releer, o al menos eso haré yo siempre que pueda para recordarme las grandes enseñanzas que esta valiente mujer nos ha regalado a través de este maravilloso libro. Hoci väčšinu zásad, o ktorých bolo písané už poznám (napríklad, že treba jesť veľa ovocia a pravidelne sa hýbať), mnohé ma prekvapili a moja čítačka, v ktorej knihu mám, je plná zvýraznených pasáži, ku ktorým sa ešte určite vrátim. Táto kniha bola pre mňa obohatením a skutočným vstúpením si do svedomia. Keď už nič aspoň som sa začala štverať do práce po schodoch a jesť oooveľa viac ovocia a zeleniny. Haar therapeutische aanpak noemt zij zelf eclectisch en intuïtief en zij beschrijft deze aanpak zelf als volgt: “het is een mengeling van inzichtelijke en cognitief-georiënteerde theorieën en methodes. Ik noem het keuzetherapie, omdat vrijheid in wezen betekent dat je kunt kiezen. Hoewel lijden onvermijdelijk en universeel is, kunnen we altijd kiezen hoe we erop reageren.”

Deși coșmarul din lagăr a luat sfârșit, trauma trecutului e cea care a bântuit-o mult timp după. D-ei, acum liberă, a rămas încă acea prizonieră sleită, înfrigurată, orfană de drepturi. Propria traumă a determinat-o s-o ia pe drumul tămăduirii durerii altora, ea însăși să ne fie, prin terapie și scris, alinarea de care a fost lipsită și care a lăsat-o cu sechele. I used to ask, “Why me?” But now I ask, “Why not me?” Perhaps I survived so I can choose what to do with what happened, and how to be here now. So I can show others how to choose life, so my parents and all the innocents didn’t die in vain. So I can turn all the lessons I learned in hell into a gift I offer you now: the opportunity to decide what kind of life you want to have, to discover the untapped potential lying in the shadows, to reveal and reclaim who you really are.Who, like myself, has suffered from boyhood to middle age, everything but death from this enervating and unnatural habit, and then, by a determined and uncompromising effort, has thrown it off, and gained, as it were, a new lease of life and the enjoyment of rest–which have lasted him to an advanced age through all exposures and privations, withoutadmitting the mischief of its consequences?“ Closed mouth during sleep It’s better to risk and grow, and maybe fail, than to remain imprisoned, never knowing what could have been.” The ISCD report in Lancet is not an easy read. It would be good subject for a New Scientist article. Perhaps it was at the time? Het boek is goed geschreven en onderbouwd en het is meer een praktische gids dan haar eerste boek De keuze, waarin zij ook al voor een deel haar therapievorm uitlegde. Hoewel ik meer hoopte op nieuwe persoonlijke anekdotes omdat ik de manier waarop zij in het leven staat zo indrukwekkend vind en hierin toch wel veel herhaald wordt uit haar vorige boek, biedt het ook interessante inzichten en inspirerende levenslessen waar iedereen wel iets uit zou kunnen halen. Een mooi boek!

Catlin was convincedthat the habit of sleeping with their mouths closed contributed to the development of the Native Americans’ fine teeth and beautiful faces. “ An Indian child is not allowed to sleep with its mouth open, from the very first sleep of its existence; the consequence of which is, that while the teeth are forming and making their first appearance, they meet (and constantly feel) each other; and taking their relative, natural, positions, form that beautiful and pleasing regularity which has secured to the American Indians, as a race, perhaps the most manly and beautiful mouths in the world.“ The first years of existence are the most important Edith Eger’s powerful first book The Choicetold the story of her survival in the concentration camps, her escape, healing, and journey to freedom. Oprah Winfrey says, “I will be forever changed by Dr. Eger’s story.” Thousands of people around the world have written to Eger to tell her how The Choicemoved them and inspired them to confront their own past and try to heal their pain; and to ask her to write another, more “how-to” book. Now, in The Gift, Eger expands on her message of healing and provides a hands-on guide that gently encourages us to change the thoughts and behaviors that may be keeping us imprisoned in the past.Healing can't happen as long as we're hiding or disowning parts of ourselves. The things we silence or cover up become like hostages in the basement, trying more and more desperately to get our attention." I cannot even begin to imagine the tragedy and sorrow that Dr. Eger witnessed, after watching her parents be sent to their deaths, having to dance before Josef Mengele, and enduring constant abuse at the hands of the Nazis. Nazi Germany was about as dysfunctional and evil as humanity has ever managed, and for someone to survive and thrive after experiencing that- they have to be an incredibly strong person. When you turn the other cheek, you look at the same thing from a new perspective. You can’t change the situation, you can’t change someone else’s mind, but you can look at reality differently. You can accept and integrate multiple points of view. This flexibility”

It’s very dangerous to put your whole life into someone else’s hands. You are the only one you’re going to have for a lifetime. All other relationships will end. So how can you be the best loving, unconditional, no-nonsense caregiver to yourself?” Healing, fulfillment, and freedom come from our ability to choose our response to whatever life brings us, and to make meaning and derive purpose from all we experience—and in particular, from our suffering. I have life to live and work to do and love to share. I don’t have time to hold on to the fear or anger or shame anymore, to give anything else to two people who already stole something from me. I won’t give them another inch. I won’t hand my power away.”

Nemôžem nič len odporúčať. Prosím prečítajte si ju. Všetci. Povinne. Sľubujem, že vám dá omnoho viac ako vám vezme :) Catlin noted that those Indian tribes that had not been influenced by the western lifestyle had zero infant mortality. Moreover, there were no deformities in their children, and no child deaths fromdisease. Whereas records of mortality for Europe during the 1850s show that aroundone in four children died at birth, and only one infour survived beyond 25 years of age.